The Circa Sutra: On That Which Is Near
Then his disciples gathered, and they were troubled by the words of the scribes and the arguments of the schools.
One asked, "Master, you speak of the Inner Kingdom. The Scribe says God is 'nearer than the jugular vein.' The Mystic says He is a 'Light in the lamp of the heart.' The Yogi says He is the 'Self' (Atman). The Sage says there is 'no self,' only 'Buddha Nature.'
"Which of these is true? Tell us the exact location, the precise name, so that we may grasp it and be saved."
And Jesus the Zennist looked at them, as a father looks at a child who is trying to hold the wind in his fist.
He said to them:
"You ask for a fixed point, but the Way is a soft focus. You demand a sharp edge, but the Kingdom is a boundless circle. You want the answer, but the Way is the letting go of the question.
You are like a man who stands by the ocean and asks, 'Where, precisely, is the tide?' You have missed the grace of the unfolding.
I say to you, the divine is not a 'thing' to be found, like a coin lost in the dust. It is the 'circa' of your own heart.
You are told of the 'still small voice.' But you listen for thunder and earthquakes, demanding proof. You miss the 'stillness' and the 'smallness,' for you are looking for a declaration, not a presence.
You are told the divine is 'nearer than the vein.' So you look at your own body, trying to divide the 'me' from the 'Him.' You have made two from One, and this is the disease of the mind.
Your ordinary self is beclouded. It is a mind lost in 'like' and 'dislike,' 'self' and 'other,' 'sacred' and 'profane.' This is the plank in your own eye. You see this 'beclouded' mind and you believe it is all that you are.
But I say to you, even the most deluded mind contains the germ of divinity.
Do not be anxious about defining this germ. Do not argue if it is 'Atman' or 'Tathata.' To name it is to lose it. A man who points at the moon is a fool if he mistakes his finger for the light.
Your spiritual life is not a fortress of perfect belief. It is the grace of imperfection. You are a work in progress. You are not your past, and you are not yet your future. You live in the 'circa' of this very moment—the liminal space of becoming.
Blessed are the 'poor in spirit,' for they have let go of the need for sharp, certain answers. They are humble enough to live around the sacred mystery.
Blessed are the 'pure in heart,' for their heart is no longer split in two by 'like' and 'dislike.' They see the One in all things.
Do not, therefore, demand the final word. The Way is beyond language.
Your path is not to arrive at a fixed point, but to walk gently around the truth. To live a 'circa' spiritual life is to let go of the need for precise measurements.
It is the humility to say, 'I do not know the exact answer, but I am here, present in the soft, approximate, and ever-unfolding grace of the now.'
This is the Kingdom. It is not 'here' or 'there.' It is 'circa'—always, and completely, near at hand."